How to encourage someone you care for to take action on their mental health

Location: United Kingdom

It’s hard to watch someone you love go through a tough time emotionally. You may desperately want to help someone who is struggling with their mental health but feel unsure what to do, leaving you feeling frustrated or helpless.

If you want to offer mental health support to loved ones but aren’t sure how, this article can help. We’ll explore how you can gently encourage them to take action without being pushy, shaming them or damaging trust in your relationship.

Understanding why someone may feel ‘stuck’

Most people experiencing a mental health challenge want to feel better. However, taking action, whether that’s booking a GP appointment or making lifestyle changes, can feel overwhelming or out of reach when they’re feeling distressed.

There are several reasons why people may feel ‘stuck’ or unable to seek support. These include:

Symptoms

Two of the most common mental health conditions in the UK are anxiety and depression.¹ While symptoms of conditions vary, some common features can make it challenging to ask for support. For instance, someone with depression may have less energy, low motivation, feel hopeless and have difficulties making decisions.² Alternatively, someone with an anxiety disorder might feel scared to seek help, worry about the unknown or be unable to think their way through the problem.³

Stigma

Research shows that more than seven in ten people with a mental health condition don’t receive treatment, and one of the main reasons why is stigma.⁴They may worry about being judged for seeking support or discriminated against.

Lack of mental health awareness

Sometimes, a person may not think their problems are ‘serious enough’ to seek support.⁵

Knowing how to support someone with depression, anxiety or another common mental health condition often starts with understanding what’s stopping them from reaching out for help. Awareness of what’s underneath their resistance means you can support them with compassion.

How to start a conversation about mental health

If you’re concerned about a friend, colleague, or loved one, check in and see how they are feeling. A sensitive conversation could help someone with mental health issues seek the support they need.

Here are some tips to help you feel more confident about having the conversation:

find a space that feels comfortable and private for both of you.
give them your full attention by turning your phone off and choosing a time when you won’t be interrupted or have to rush off.
have an idea of what you want to say, whether that’s expressing concern or sharing changes you’ve noticed.
listen and try to understand their point of view. It might be the first time they’ve talked about their problems, so you may need to be patient while they find the words.
ask questions to understand them better, but remember not everyone will want to talk in-depth.
avoid minimising their concerns (such as by saying ‘just be more positive’).
ask how you can help them. If they aren’t sure, you could make suggestions. However, avoid telling them what they should do.

Make taking action feel easier

If you’re wondering how to get someone help for mental health difficulties, remember your support can go a long way. Challenges that seem overwhelming on their own may become more manageable with you by their side.

For instance, if you’re wondering how to help someone with anxiety, you might offer to sit with them while they make phone calls or book appointments.

You could also help break bigger tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. For example, the task ‘improve mental health’ may feel overwhelming and have no clear starting point. Yet you might be able to help them break it down into smaller steps, such as ‘call GP for an appointment,’ ‘order grocery shopping online’ and ‘go for a ten-minute walk today.’

Making taking action feel safer can also help. For instance, if you wanted to encourage someone to seek therapy, you could search together online over a cup of tea to make it a more pleasant experience.

Tailor your support to your relationship

The way you help someone with mental health difficulties may vary depending on your relationship.

If you are supporting a partner with mental health issues, it’s important to balance compassion with clear boundaries. While you may want to help, avoid becoming their sole support and try to ensure they receive professional help.

When helping a friend with depression (or another challenge), you could aim to check in with them regularly while respecting their independence.

Plus, supporting family members with their mental health may require patience and tact, especially if you know they can become defensive.

What to do when someone resists help

Sometimes, you may wonder how to encourage someone to get mental health help when they seem to resist any support. Remember, no matter how much you want to help, you can’t force them to do anything. Support doesn’t mean sacrificing your own wellbeing.

Still, you can continue to let them know you care, keep conversations open and encourage them to seek professional help.

Small actions count

Positive changes to mental health don’t always look big or dramatic. Small actions add up, too. What matters most is consistency, and your support could make a real difference as they seek help.

If you’d like more information on how to help a loved one, explore our free resources below. And don’t forget to look after your own mental health as you go through this, it is not always easy to support other people and sometimes there is no ‘quick fix’.

You can also get mental health support through:

NHS 111: Get help from 111 online or call 111 and choose the mental health option.
Mind infoline: You can call the Mind infoline on 0300 123 3393 with questions about mental health problems, where to get help and treatment options.
CALM Helpline and webchat: If you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts or are at risk of harm, call the CALM helpline on 0800 58 58 58 or use their webchat service from 5 pm until midnight, 365 days of the year.

References

NHS England Digital. (2025, November 27). Adult Psychiatric Morbidity Survey: Survey of Mental Health and Wellbeing, England, 2023/4. https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/adult-psychiatric-morbidity-survey/survey-of-mental-health-and-wellbeing-england-2023-24/common-mental-health-conditions
NHS Website. (2025, December 23). Symptoms - Depression in adults. https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/depression-in-adults/symptoms/
Mental Health Foundation. (2022, February 21). Anxiety. https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/a-z-topics/anxiety

Henderson, C., Evans-Lacko, S., & Thornicroft, G. (2013). Mental illness stigma, help seeking, and public health programs. American Journal of Public Health, 103(5), 777–780. https://doi.org/10.2105/ajph.2012.301056
Radez, J., Reardon, T., Creswell, C., Lawrence, P. J., Evdoka-Burton, G., & Waite, P. (2020). Why do children and adolescents (not) seek and access professional help for their mental health problems? A systematic review of quantitative and qualitative studies. European Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 30(2), 183–211. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00787-019-01469-4